Measures of Love
by skrinkle
Summary: Shinji wants to know just why Kaworu loves him as much as he says he does. Kaworu/Shinji


This is my first Eva fanfic, just a little lovey-dovey drabble. ^^

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Shinji allowed his head to rest against Kaworu's shoulder as a pale hand reached down to entwine fingers with his own. He inhaled the scent of him, clean and welcoming and familiar, though he was unsure why, as he buried his cheek in the material of his shirt. The setting sun was still bright enough to warm the bricks of the wall they sat against, the cicadas finally quieting their familiar daytime buzz. They sat on the outskirts of town, looking down upon the silent and barren city of countless dangers, the city called home. It had been Kaworu's idea to go there, to escape for a while. As the wind wafted through the seldom wandered streets, he began to hum idly.

Shinji peered up at him, at his soft eyes half hidden by silver hair glinting in the bloodshot light. "…Kaworu?"

"Hmm?"

"Why do you say you love me?"

"Because I do."

"I don't mean…well, it's just that I haven't known you for very long. But…"

"Can you really measure love in time? Just because I've barely met you doesn't mean I can't understand you and value you any less than if we'd know each other since the beginning of time." He paused, carefully weighing his next words. "I love you because you're the first person I've met that doesn't look for love for the wrong reasons. You're fragile. You're pure, untouched. You've shielded yourself from others for so long that your outlook on companionship is tarnished, but your reasons stay true. Which makes you all the more deserving to be loved."

Shinji bit his lip, sitting up to have a better look at the boy sitting next to him. "S-sorry. It's just that I've told you all about myself, my life. I don't usually talk about myself all that much…and I barely know anything about you."

"Is that a problem?" He turned to face the younger boy, his face drawn with genuine concern.

The young pilot studied him for a moment, examining his unease before breaking into a warm smile. "No. I've told you about me because I know I can trust you, somehow. You tell me about yourself whenever you want to." He snuggled into Kaworu's arms, who presently them to invite him in.

A wiry arm snaked around the dark haired boy's waist, pulling him even closer. Kaworu ghosted his lips along Shinji's jaw before pressing kisses to his mouth. Shinji placed an idle hand on his shoulder, closing his eyes to return soft kisses before opening his mouth to tentatively connect his tongue with the other. All was silent save for the rustling wind as they huddled into one another, exploring one other. Shinji soon found himself breathless and clutching at his neck as Kaworu mapped hard wet circles around his tongue, as Kaworu gently began to suck on his bottom lip while quietly untucking his shirt. He slid his cold hand beneath the material, making Shinji shiver and gasp as his fingertips traced the skin of his chest and belly.

"I love you because you're different from the rest. Because you're endlessly intriguing. Because you need care. Because you're actually stronger than you give yourself credit for." He took Shinji's chin in his other hand, punctuating each sentence with a kiss. A suggestive look glinted his eyes as he teasingly tugged on the waistband of his pants. "Because you look really good in that plugsuit."

Shinji averted his eyes with an embarrassed smile, his cheeks turning a light hue of the sky. Chuckling, Kaworu placed his hand on the back of his head, drawing him closer to rest against his chest. A contented sigh escaped from Shinji's lips as he closed his eyes as he nuzzled against his chest.

"Kaworu?"

"Yes, Shinji?"

"I love you too."

And it felt so good to say those words. Even though he had known next to nothing about the boy in which he had confided such revered words, he knew it did not suppress their meaning in the slightest. Kaworu, he was sure, deserved every bit of his love in return. If he didn't measure love in time, he would measure it in kindness. If that was to be, then Kaworu was the one person who loved him to an extent no one else had. For so long he had lived without the comfort of human affection, and this new pilot, who seemed more as a savoir than a boy to him, had completely taken his heart. He thought he might burst with the bliss swelling inside of him. But that would be just fine, because he would have known he was loved even in death.

Shinji shook in his arms, unable to supress the grateful tears welling in his eyes. For the first time since he could remember, he was truly, _truly_ happy.


End file.
